Ways to Maintain a Healthy Level of Insanity

· When The Money Comes Out The ATM, Scream "I Won! I Won!"
· When Leaving The Zoo, Start Running Towards The Parking lot, Yelling "Run For Your Lives! They're Loose!"
· Put Decaf In The Coffee Maker For 3 Weeks Once Everyone has Gotten Over Their Caffeine Addictions, Switch to Espresso.
· Put Your Garbage Can On Your Desk And Label it "In".
· Page Yourself Over The Intercom. Don't Disguise Your Voice.
· Tell Your Children Over Dinner, "Due To The Economy, We Are Going To Have To Let One Of You Go."
· Finish All Your sentences with "In Accordance With The Prophecy".
· At Lunch Time, Sit In Your Parked Car With Sunglasses on and point a Hair Dryer At Passing Cars. See If They Slow Down.
· As Often As Possible, Skip Rather Than Walk.
· Sing Along At The Opera.
· Specify That Your Drive-through Order Is "To Go".
· Put Mosquito Netting Around Your Work Area and Play tropical Sounds All Day
· Go To A Poetry Recital. And Ask Why The Poems Don't Rhyme?
· 14.Every Time Someone Asks You To Do Something, ask If They Want Fries with that.
· Have Your Co-workers Address You By Your Wrestling Name, Rock Bottom.